Stalled in bumper to bumper traffic, we weren't moving anywhere in this part of Vegas.
I bent over to grab my cell phone and noticed the half naked woman on rear door of the truck in front of us.
THEY REALLY WANT TO MEET YOU.
I stretched from one side to the other and saw that each side of the truck had a large picture of a blond-haired woman clad in black lacy lingerie .
She was reclining in the classic men's magazine pose: lips parted and tugging at her bikini bottom....the ...I-must-pull-these-off-RIGHT-NOW!...look.
This was not a small truck....consequently.....this woman was HUGE.
"Huh. Do you see the woman on the truck in front of us?"
Hub was staring straight ahead and probably had been for a long time....he was being a very attentive driver....and probably had been oggling her for miles.
Since I like words...I couldn't help but focus on the short one liner under her body......They really want to meet you.
So interesting....because ...by inserting the word "really"......it implies that these women are guaranteed to like you.... a man doesn't have to fear rejection.
In other words....no worries....unlike women in the real world....these women will always welcome your presence.
Another truck with a similar billboard passed by. I felt a pang of ......discomfort.
Yes...it's Vegas....but ....geeez 12 foot high girlie ads are just so .....obvious.
Turning my attention to the sidewalk crowds.....I noticed groups of men in bright hunter orange t-shirts in clumps every couple blocks. The shirts were stiff...new and cheap....and worn over dingy clothes.
GO GO GO GIRLS
They were handing out something.
"I wonder what they're giving out?" I said to hub.
"Girlie Trading cards. There are some on the back seat."
I twisted around and searched the back seat until I found 4 trading cards. Cody. Hope. Suri. Stacey.
"Where did you get these?"
"They were handing them out at the gas station where we picked up the sodas."
"How come you didn't show them to me????"
Hub was silent. It was a dangerous moment for him.
Was I miffed he picked them up or kept them??? or was I miffed because he hadn't share this interesting little treasure????
Sensing his distress....I let him off the hook.
"These are so...interesting. Girlie trading cards. Look at the little credit card logos. Hmmmm...why is Hope running a special for $37....why would a woman be on sale?????? I mean if she's a prostitute isn't she on sale already???? What do you think you get for $47?? Do you think it's just the price to get to the door????? How much do they do?????
My hub is a diplomatic and cautious man who has lived with me a long time. If he knew the answers....he probably figured it was best not to tell me ...... and if he didn't know the answers...he was content to listen to my ever growing wave of questions.
I tucked the trading cards into my purse...since we finally saw the sign for our hotel.
During our entire stay in Vegas, a steady stream of giant almost-naked women cruised back and forth along the Strip..... and every few blocks a sad cluster of men ( I say sad...only because all the men were very short dark Hispanic men who appeared not to understand or speak much English...and looked uncomfortable) in orange shirts handed out more cards.
Just before leaving Vegas, I decided to hold out my hand as we passed one of them.....to get a few more cards. The man ....looked shocked....he was obviously programmed to offer cards to any man passing by....but not a woman.
He reluctantly gave me a few cards.
Hub rolled his eyes. I imagine it's not easy living with a curious woman.
"Look here.......right on top.....a Gina card!!!.....and she's special .....only 47.00....Do you think we should call her...and just see what they say?? I mean...don't you wonder how they talk to a client....what they say ...what they offer to do??"
My hub suggested a gellato...which in hub-speak means......spare me from the inquisition.
So.... I pouted...and ordered a hazelnut concoction.....and became quiet and pensive ....thinking of men and women and sex and fun and using people as toys....I mean.... is it okay to use people as toys if there is mutual consent to be toys to each other???? what if one person sees the other person as real and one person sees the other as a toy??
Fortunately my gellato dripped all over my pants..... which in real-life means....can it.
"Hey....Let's go buy some t-shirts for the kids."
I tucked Gina in my purse for the trip home.
This weekend...I'm going to give her a call and find out what they say and what they do. I mean ...I have caller-ID block....and don't you really want to know at least if they say ...."Hello I'm Gina???? And what would they say to a woman?? How do they sound???