The End of the Week.

It' s so quiet in my house right now.... I can hear the hard drive hummmmm on my computer.

I can't remember when I've had the house to myself on a Friday night. Someone is always home especially in the evenings. But I shipped hub off to Savannah today for a 5 day conference....and my sons are either working or out.

It's a bit spooky.....but I am grateful for the quiet.

It's been a strange week....full of stress and decisions.

Last night my writing fish died. Ever since I went to the keyboard....I've kept a red Beta...a Siamese Fighting Fish....in a small aquarium near my desk. I know fish have little brains...but somehow Faulkner internalized a bit of life beyond the glass ...so that when my hand came near....he would circle and wait for his food. I watched him swim while I worked from my computer. He was small company....small comfort.....and even though he was only a couple of inches of life... my office seems empty without him.

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My old Springer Spaniel nearly died this week too. Anaphylactic shock. I took him to the vet for a routine checkup and shots... in the parking lot afterwards....he laid down on the gravel and his breathing became more and more labored. He's an anxious mealy type of dog....so at first I thought he was just over excited by the dreaded trip to the vet.

But by the time hub came out of the office....Mike's rib cage was heaving. Hub scooped him up and we went back inside. In the exam room, I took off his collar and leash ....I noticed his tongue was turning blue....He's going to die...I though.....he has only minutes.....with tears rolling down my face.....I took off his leash and collar. He stared up at me....his eyes bulging with panic and asking for help.... Dr. Bill came in and carried him off..... someone closed the door.

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God I hate sitting behind the closed door....while pet or family member or someone you care about is on the other side....in acute distress. We sat and waited to see if he would live or die. Quick injections, oxygen, and an ice bath to combat a 106 degree temp (normal in shock).....brought him back. We picked him up a couple of hours later.... he looked exhausted but fine. I was antsy and anxious for the rest of the day and had troubled dreams all night.

My outdoor work being a chigger hor doeuvres also made me realize that I'm going to have to become a housewife for a while. The house desperately needs a wife. With hub and I so busy plus teen boys.....the house is always at the bottom of the list.

There are a dozen projects waiting....a bit of dry rot....a leaky sink....weird gutter run off.....a growing crack in a window....each week I try to tackle something....the problem is when the list has 12 or 13 things on it....you fix one or two things but one or two things get added on to the list ...so you never advance.

At first, I thought I could tackle all the projects by the end of October, then Thanksgiving, now I'm thinking January 1st. It feels strange to "flip" my days. Usually I do writing, correspondence, errands and other work first then the house.....now its coffee, a quick glance at the NY times online and my email....then yard...house....yard....house.

I keep telling myself it's only for a couple of months....and holiday hours will be coming up at the bookstore plus other commitments....so I won't be locked in the house.

But still....dry rot...leaks....yardwork...for 2.5 months......that's a prison sentence.....lol.....

Just attach the ball and chain and give me my weed whacker.....

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Don't Worry Be Happy or..........

You Can Sleep When You're Dead

I hate when I do this.....but it can happen when you do a lot of work from home. I OVERSLEPT...big time.....I hit that little button on the alarm turned around and said to myself, "One more minute." At 10AM, I opened my eyes, groaned, and covered my head with the blanket. Bad Bad Girl.....and now Bad Bad Girl will have to work all evening to make up for it.

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With a huge cup of coffee (some of my mugs look like small pails), I sat down at my desk and pulled out the above calender. Holy Sheet! How can the first week of the New Year already be so filled up....(and don't be saying, "It's because you didn't finish you're work from last year." The thought did cross my mind.)

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I actually felt panicked. My manuscript due to the publisher next week and columns and columns of stuff needing to get done. Oh what's a Bad Girl to do? And then out of nowhere I remembered this story. A travel story....(my favorite kind of course...)

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When I was traveling Asia... or if you prefer....Once upon a time when I was in Asia.... I had a guide, Outai, who was a former Buddhist monk. He had the patience of an angel....or should I say a Buddhist Angel. We were traveling with a Dentist from California and his Ohh-so-pretty-blond-cutesy-social worker-wife who needed to have hours of prep time in the morning to "put on her face" and needed time during the day to "maintain her face." (I won't argue about her maintenance time ...trust me if you saw what the heat in Thailand did to lipstick, mascara and foundation by mid-afternoon... you would grant her this time too)

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She whined....no....correction.....she whined about never having enough time....time to put on her face, time to maintain her face....time to shop and time to do this or that... One particularly whiney day....she even got to Outai. She whined about something and he turned around and snapped...."Just do what you must do....You can sleep all you want when you're dead!"

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I can still see his dark eyes glaring at her for that long minute.......then he suddenly relaxed, smiled, his beautiful mahogany face once again a study in composure.

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So it's a do what you must do day.....and how's your calender looking for the new year already?

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Hmmmmm........Do I hear Whining??????